Are You Happier than a Cow?

Have you ever watched a cow, standing in a field, munching away on grass? She doesn’t care if she looks fat, she’s not worried about the other cows talking about her behind her back (although they might be – who knows), she doesn’t worry about whether she’s being oppressed by the farmer……..she eats grass, craps and sleeps. Sounds like bullShe doesn’t worry about whether the bull will find her attractive or will call her back the next day if they have sex (I think we can safely assume he won’t – your average bull has a pretty one track mind).

She doesn’t worry about her calves; she’ll love them and make sure they eat, sleep and crap but that’s as far as it goes. She doesn’t try to interpret the side long glances that she gets from other cows or to find meaning in, what could be considered to be, a strategically placed cow pat.

She notices food when it arrives but doesn’t give a shit who delivers it or what they look like and she never worries about eating too much hay or whether it would be a good idea to run round the field a bit more often. If another cow starts eating beside her, she might lift up her head and give a slight umprph! but then she’ll move over and carry on eating somewhere else; she certainly won’t kick the other cow in the udders and demand that she sticks to her side of the field.

She might experience fear sometimes, if a rogue plastic bag goes flying across her field but, if that should happen, she’ll run away and she’ll assume that her fellow cows will do the same if they know what’s good for them.

Earth to cowShe doesn’t worry about the grass running out – it was there yesterday and tomorrow?…..well cows don’t really have much of an imagination so they don’t tend to think much further ahead than the next mouthful of grass and possibly the next crap, they’re not really what you’d call big thinkers…

When a cow is sick or tired she stops until she feels better. If she doesn’t feel better she doesn’t concern herself with why or worry about the things that she could have done better in her life. She thinks about grass and then she dies, without worrying beforehand about whether or not she’ll go to cow heaven or indeed whether a not such a place even exists. (Let’s face it, if cow heaven did exist, it would be full of grass and bulls so nice place to be but what will she be missing out on if she doesn’t go).

So there you have it – a cow’s life. Now, let me ask you, are you happier than a cow?



  4 comments for “Are You Happier than a Cow?

  1. Ataraxik
    May 22, 2018 at 12:08 pm

    I used to work on a dairy farm around 7-8 years ago. Cows aren’t really happy. They’re not smart enough to feel any emotions other than, hungry, not hungry.


    • May 22, 2018 at 2:37 pm

      Perhaps that’s just because they’re keeping the secret of true happiness to themselves and just pretending to be a bit stupid 😉


  2. Samantha
    May 31, 2018 at 10:56 pm

    Ha! Absolutely love this!


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